Frickin Chocobos - Tennis elbow generators

Ok. We have a Hexxit server.
So one day my other half suggests I breed chocobos.
"Why yes," I say, "That sounds like a good idea."

WTF was I thinking?

I managed to scrounge up a few yellow choco-bastards and corralled them as best I could.
Grew acres and acres of frickin Gysahl Greens.
Then off to the pens.
Right-Click, Right-Click, frickin-right, frickin-click.

I am so SICK to the back teeth of right clicking.
And the incessant "Wiperoo" sound they make.
Aaaaaaah. Frickin Aaaaaaaah!
I'm going nutso-bong!

So after many, many hours of right clicking I get a few Greens and Blues.
And after many, many hours of chasing the mad, flighty bird-bugger-it-i'll-kill-them-alls around I manage to get 3 whites ones.

And... Wait for it... They're all FUCKING female.

Now I want to share something.
Something dark.
Very dark.
And I *KNOW* dark.
I want to imagine you've been breeding these frickin noisy flighty birds for ages.
And you try once again to breed a white one.
And you get yet another frickin baby Blue or Green.
And you snap.
Snap.
Snap deeply and profoundly.
"Crack goes the mind boys, crack, crack, crack."
And you chase that frickin little choco-kid-bastard around with a steel sword until you get it.
And you retreat from the awful, hateful, awful, incessant "Wiperoo" sounds to the safety of your house.
Burdened down by frickin blocks of frickin feathers.
WHAT THE FRICKIN USE ARE THE FRICKIN FEATHERS?
I HAVE FRICKIN CHESTS FULL OF THE STUPID THINGS.

Anyway, calming down now.
Deep breaths.
Chests with 12 by 64 blocks of choco-drum-sticks.
Cooked.
Cooked child chocobo-drum-sticks.
Nom.
Nom Nom.
Nom-frickin-child-chocobo-drum-sticks.

Oh the choco-bird-ity of it all.

Then!
Then!
Then your spouse announces that he's been to the Nether and managed to coax three PURPLE chochobos back.
And crows over his achievement!
Oh.
And he has equipped them with saddles.
And...
And...
I just remember being up to my arm pits in chocobo-chicks with a steel sword.

I FRICKIN HATE chocobos.

And I have tennis elbow.
In the real world.
Frack it.

I'm off to dig a hole.

Update! My other half took some umbrage at the above. He suggested that his effort to bring back Purple ones from the nether was a Herculean task and he should be lauded. I did that female thing of staring at him in a 'pointed', 'dagger' like manner. He suggested that I open a Kentucky Fried Chocobo Stand. I demurred. Meh.